distraction.

It's that time of year again, where the sun disappears and the sky is a resolute void of color, and I can usually be found hunched on the couch with a cup of tea in my hand, begging the Lord to give me a slice of sunshine just for a moment.

It is the time of fog that billows in to all of the nooks and crevices of my brain and burrows itself in, making it hard to think or accomplish anything, since I can't seem to keep myself focused long enough to actually follow through. Where I find myself fighting to just get-out-of-the-house and just-cook-dinner and just-go-for-a-run and just-stay-sane.

It is the time of distractions in the form of anything and everything:
--too many tv shows
--too many blogs
--too many chores
--too many moments

And sometimes the problem is that I know I need to sacrifice the little distractions in order to achieve the greater wellness, but it's hard.
(Which is so ridiculous, but it's true.)

I know that keeping up with fifty blogs about how to be a mom and keep your house clean and write well and look good and eat healthily is not actually beneficial, but in reality makes me neurotic.
But I do it anyway, because I don't want to be "left out" and maybe if I can just get my life together, I too, can look like those people and their nice lives.

I know that picking out every single lump and roll and line on my body does not motivate me to work harder and stop eating junk. But what it does do, is make me want to crawl back under the covers with the entire pan of brownies and just give up, because why even try anyway?

I know that comparing and wishing and desiring and hoping are not, actually, going to get me that perfect house/car/wardrobe/life. I know that "looking at everyone's highlight reel" is not reality and comparing it to my "behind the scenes" is a surefire way to make myself miserable, but I still find myself wanting that new purse that she got, or going on a tropical vacation like they did, or buying a new house like his.

And clearly the answer to all of these problems is to simply STOP with the frenzied pace and the million influences all plugged into my life.
But the sad part is that it's hard, because in a sick and slightly twisted way, I like these influences.
I like the few moments of dreaming of myself wearing all of the clothes on my Pinterest board, or imagining what I'll look like after working out five times a week and eating Paleo (never mind where my child will be during these four-hour workouts each day). It's like a rush of adrenaline and endorphins shot straight into the aching, empty part of my brain that can't see the sky outside my window but can see it on the screens all around me.

And I just want to be free.

Love.
Joy.
Peace.
Patience.
Kindness.
Goodness.
Faithfulness.
Gentleness.
Self-control.

Read more...

mom-wear-wednesday [8]

coat: Anchor Blue// jeans: Express// cami: Charlotte Russe//
necklace: West One// sandals: Primark

on Jameson:
 pants, vest: Carter's// t-shirt: target// sandals: the Golden Boot

I bet you guys thought I forgot about this week and was going to break my promise (again).

Well, this almost actually happened, due to the fact that the surprise guest above did not feel like going to bed and staying there until 9:14 pm (which happens to be the time that I am currently writing this post).
This, friends, is why it is called mom-wear-wednesday. I should probably tie that whole mom-thing into the blog name too, since I seem to bring it up all the time.

Oh well.

I guess I'm just going to have to take pride in being a "mommy blogger" now, instead of the serious and accomplished writer I used to be.

Anyway, onto the clothes.
Like I said before, I am loving that fall Autumn is here. I feel like I have clothes that are a lot more suited to this season, and I also feel like I pull them off a little better. Summer is about wearing as little as you can get away with and this can result in looks that are not so flattering for those of us with spare stomach skin and stretch marks from carrying children in our bodies.
So when the time comes to cover yourself up with style, I like the challenge.

I love this jacket, even though it's probably five years old.
I bought it when I worked retail before I left for college and it has become one of my favorite fall Autumn jackets. It's got a nice shape, a good neutral color and it's not overly warm. In fact, I haven't taken any pictures for next week yet because I've been wearing this jacket every day and I figure that I should probably come up with something new for you all to see.

Do you like how I have finally made Jameson take pictures with me for this week? Actually, let's try, 'Do you like how Jameson got tired of Dad standing in the doorway taking pictures of Mom and decided to make a break for it while he saw the opportunity?' Because I think that's a little closer to the truth.

Oh well. At least he's cute.
And he's got a nice sense of style. Which fits in well.

Read more...

mom-wear-wednesday [7]

sweater: West One// jeans: Express// boots: Payless

necklace: Past Times// nails: Rimmel 60-second dry in "Grey Matter"

Well folks, we're back.

After an unscheduled absence last week, I decided to try to make up for it by giving you a real, put-together outfit complete with accessories and polished nails.

Also, please note my reverse ombre hair that has occurred because I am too poor to keep up a dye job (and because it takes two boxes of the stuff from the store because I have too much hair). So actually, I am just setting a new trend that none of you all have caught on to yet.

Finally, please be aware that everything but the sweater in this outfit is at least two years old, if not older. And I bought that sweater in the middle of June, when it was on sale, because I knew how flaky summer was (and then I wore it a few weeks later during one of our "cold snaps"). Oh well. Look at me being resourceful.

But bigger than anything else is the news that fall Autumn is officially here.

Which I am really excited about, because it means boots and sweaters and pumpkins and spices and hot tea with good books while the wind blows and the leaves fall.
But I am also sad, because it means the chance for summer is gone and I didn't get so many of those amazing summer things that I love. However, I am trying my best to embrace where and when I am at, so I am now saying, "Bring on the pumpkins."
Except that England is kind of lacking in the pumpkin department, which has led to me ordering pumpkin candles online since I can't find them anywhere else.
(ex-pat problems)

Anyway. I am loving big flow-y sweaters this year, because they are so comfortable and super flattering.   Not to mention that I can also wear them with leggings if the mood strikes, or a cute skirt and tights (if I actually owned those things).
I've kind of jumped on the gre(a)y bandwagon, too, even though that's been around since last year. I just like the different look and it pairs well with other colors--it looked great with the turquoise nail polish I had for summer, but will also look good with the deep purple I bought for fallAutumn/winter.
And I love long necklaces because when I wear them I don't have to worry about other accessories. It's a one-stop-shop thing, and as a mother, I appreciate the ease of not having to think.

Okay, friends. That's it for this week.
I promise to be back here next week (I've already taken the pictures, so I'll actually keep that promise this time) and I've even got a surprise guest.
Aren't you just dying to know who it is?

Read more...

summer days

It's almost the end of July and "summer" has just barely arrived.
The weather people are saying that it will last for this whole week, but I always take English weather with a grain of salt.
So, for now, we are spending as much time outdoors and in the sun as we can, since I know that fall/winter/eternal rain will be on us sooner than we know it.
I think I should have been born in California, because ever since I moved to England, I've discovered that I need sunshine like I need water. It just changes everything.

And this guy...oh, this guy melts my heart every. single. day.

How have you celebrated summer so far? Got any tips to make me feel better about the awful (except for this week) British weather?

Read more...