sweatin' for my fitness

I should exercise. Really.
Standing around and checking out my butt in the floor-length mirror is doing nothing for me, except reminding me of how well that cellulite cream that I bought on sale does NOT work.
In fact (I just accidentally typed "in fat"...how symbolic is that?), in a burst of "I will get thin" motivation, I just signed up for the Self 2009 Challenge.
I tried this last year, and made it about half way. However, they've reformatted a lot and it looks much more "user-friendly" than before. You now have the ability to choose your form of exercise and also determine how much you want to lose.
Unfortunately, I have just been jarred into shapely reality by discovering that in order to lose 2 pounds per week, I have to burn 500 calories a day (or 3,500 calories a week) while eating 1,600 calories a day.

aka, starve and work my butt off while doing so.

They also have a handy meal plan, but unfortunately they seem to have forgotten that we are in a recession period here in America and also, I am a full-time college student with a part-time job and a husband who is in the same boat. We shop at Aldi (the "family dollar" of grocery stores), not Whole Foods. In fact, the only time I have ever even set foot in a Whole Foods was when I was doing this colon/liver cleanse and had to buy all this organic stuff or I was just going to end up putting in more parasites than I took out. But that's another post for another time...

Anyway, all of this to say, that I now have to a) exercise forever, b) starve while, c) eating the only rabbit food I can afford.

Can we just go back to the days of corsets and pantaloons where your big thighs were covered up by big bloomers and your excess fat was pushed up to make your bosoms look larger?
I mean, come on.
Looks like it's time to invest in some Spanx.